You’ve been invited to an Indian wedding. You are so excited your socks are knocked off, and you can barely think about what to wear.
Maybe the pink A-cut spring dress I saw at the store?
Or I could wear that snazzy vintage lace dress I picked up last week and didn’t know where to wear it to.
Or…
OMG, I’M GOING TO AN INDIAN WEDDING, WHAT DO I WEAR?
Okay, don’t freakout. That’s why your handy dandy writer Preeti is here to help. I’m bringing you tips, dos and don’t on what to wear for ladies and gentleman at an Indian wedding. PS – some of the links below lead to other sites where you can buy stuff; we get a commission and that helps us keep writing.
The Basics:
- Generally wearing pure white and black are avoided during the wedding. Wedding and wedding related events are colorful, loud, and fun.
- Of course if you have a fabulous white or black dress that you would never wear for a funeral, then you can wear it.
- Avoid dresses and outfits that scream boobage. You know those dresses ladies; they’re not accepted at Indian weddings. South Asian weddings are traditional and religious (Hindu, Muslim, Jain, Sikh), be prudent and leave the strapless, tight fitting, hip hugging dress for another time.
- Men, do dress up. Skip the jeans and t-shirts and be formal. We see a lot of weddings held in India are lax in the dress code for men. Don’t be that slob. Be a gentlemen.
- Accessories are the most important part of Indian outfits. There is so much to buy, but you don’t have to wear everything. Bindis and bangles are the most common to wear. Many girls will also wear payals, or anklets, and some will wear mang tikkas, basically huge bindis.
- If you are attending a Muslim nikah or a Sikh wedding at the gurdwara (temple), you may need to cover your head. Keep a shawl/scarf with you that matches your outfit.
Indian clothing is beautiful, colorful, and detailed. If you have an opportunity to buy Indian clothes, do!
Haldi Ceremony
For the haldi ceremony, everyone gets to “paint” the bride and groom with a turmeric paste. Typically the bride and the groom have separate events at their own houses, therefore you maybe invited to one or the other.
Because turmeric can stain bright yellow, wear an old pair of khakis/jeans and a shirt that can live with a stain.
Women: Ladies wear soft, flowly dresses or salwar kameez if possible. Go with oranges, pinks and cream colors.
Men: Guys, this is the only time you can wear jeans and t-shirts. Or a simple kurta pajama set.
Mehndi Ceremony
The mehndi or henna ceremony is more for the girls, though it’s customary for men to gate crash.
Women: The girls should wear something comfortable and nice but acceptable to get some henna stains (if you’re careful, you won’t get any). I do not recommend sweatpants and hoodie though.
Many women can wear a nice tunic top with a long skirt or jeans. If you have a simple Indian outfit, go for it!
Men: This would be time to wear the light summer khakis as the men would be lounging around drinking whiskey/bourbon/insert-drink-here and organizing last minute wedding planning.
Sangeet/Garba Party
The sangeet is the traditional song and dance done at weddings. It is customary for friends to participate in some dance or act. It’s fun, it’s silly.
Gujarati weddings will have traditional folk dancing called garba and raas in which everyone can dance.
Indian clothes are preferred because dancing would be difficult otherwise.
Women: A light lengha choli, sari, or salwar kameez. If you don’t have anything Indian, wear clothing that you can easily dance in and your boobs will not fall out.
Men: A simple kurta pajama in cotton or linen. No Indian clothes? Wear a polo shirt and nice jeans (I said NICE!). Or, if the Sangeet is being held in a formal location, go for a suit that is easy to dance in.
Wedding ceremony
Men: Consider a nice kurta pajama set or a western suit. Instead of wearing a white button down, pick something more colorful to be in tune with the wedding.
Women: Salwar kameez, sari, or chenia choli can be found in silk, chiffon, crepe, cotton and in many styles. Pick what you love best.
If you want to wear a western outfit, it is perfectly acceptable too. However, do not wear short skirts, low necklines, strappy tops, or anything revealing the bust. Dresses can be accessorized with bangles and bindis and bright purse.
Indians love colors; this is your opportunity to go wild.
Manish Arora, the famous Indian couture designer once said “Indians love to wear colorful clothes and they know how to. Europeans go wild when “red” is in season (compared to black, white, or gray) because it’s being ‘out there’.”
Go Manish, we know you love those crazy colors.
Wedding reception/dinner
Men: You can either change into a suit (with tie) or wear your kurta. We’re advising to change to something not worn at the ceremony earlier in the day as Indians love wearing several outfits.
Women: As with men, you can stay the same or wear a new outfit. Western dresses are perfectly acceptable as long as they are tasteful. Meaning, if you have big bust, keep it wrapped nicely. =) Strappy dresses are accepted as long as they are again, elegant.
Have fun and enjoy the colors, styles, and madness associated with an Indian wedding.
PS – Just don’t look like Katy Perry in India.
My husband’s family and my bridesmaids actually ended up renting their clothes from http://www.luxemi.com for my wedding last October. The staff was really helpful in helping them figure out to wear (so I didn’t have to) 🙂
This has been so helpful! Thank you so much!
What do you call the pink hats (turbans) male guests wear?
It is called “Pagdi”
This is great info! Now I don’t feel hesitant about going, and look forward to enjoying the day!
as a cross dresser I love the indian dress code, my only concern is upsetting indian people, the fact a man wants to wear female clothes is not always acceptable but the coloures and feel of this attire is truly awesome
What do you think about brides who were married recently wearing their wedding lenghas to other weddings in the future?
Hi Jen, thanks for the question!
I think it’s okay to wear your wedding lengha to another wedding with some restrictions. If your wedding outfit was more “simple”, i.e. without a whole lot of crystals and embellishments, you’re probably safe to wear it any other Indian wedding/reception. If your wedding outfit was ornate, i.e. with lots of sequins/crystals, reserve that outfit for a wedding ceremony/reception that will be opulent. While it’s not uncommon to upstage the bride (because married women have a whole lot more gold to wear), try not to do it in an obvious manner.
And consider the venue. If the wedding will be held at the Ritz Carlton or Four Seasons, or something similar, chances are, women will be putting their finest finery on. But if the venue is at a more cozy location, consider dressing down your wedding outfit by not wearing heavy jewelry, wear it for the reception, or wear something else from your wedding trousseau.
Hope this helps!
This information has been so helpful. Thank you. I now feel prepared. I have a question, though. I am the step-mother to the American bride-to-be. We are buying gifts for my daughter’s soon to be mother-in-law. Is silver jewelry ok to buy for her? I am noticing an abundance of gold in pictures and on other websites for the Indian women at the wedding, and I do not want to offend anyone by giving the wrong type of jewelry.
Oh, and here’s another question. Our soon to be in-laws want to treat everyone in our family by buying some of our wedding clothes. While this is very generous of them, my husband and I feel a little weird about it. Would we offend our new family by politely declining or just go with the flow?
Hi Kay,
Thank you for the lovely comment!
Yes, I think silver jewelry is just fine. Indians usually buy gold for jewelry and silver for silverware/cups/anklets, but there’s no hard and fast rule. With gold prices the way they are, many people are opting for some silver in wedding gifts.
My in-laws had the same issue about the clothes. They were definitely uncomfortable about it. What my parents, my husband, and I did was tell them we would buy the clothes for our engagement ceremony and for the wedding they can buy their own. My parents understood why they felt uncomfortable, but they couldn’t not buy anything. It was be very poor form on our side if we gave nothing to them.
My advice would be to accept with an open heart the clothes they buy for you, perhaps go shopping with them (or provide your favorite colors if asked), and reciprocate by giving gifts to them. Indian weddings center around gift giving between the families. It’s a really big deal and can make people totally crazy too.
This is so good! Amazing 🙂
I am a white woman from the US, attending an Indian wedding in NYC soon. I bought a bright green dress for the wedding and reception, but it is sleeveless. The straps are wide, but it is still sleeveless nonetheless. Is this ok? I have a shawl I can wear to cover my shoulders during the wedding. Another option I found was a long-sleeved dress, but the length came just above my knee which I thought wasn’t acceptable (based on my reading here). Is the strapless dress ok for the wedding and reception? Any and all help is appreciated.