Well, Hello there BFIW world! Long time no see! It’s me, Abby (aka CWG), writer of a few of the mildly ranty posts about strapless gowns (still loathe them with every fiber of my being), etc.
Anyways, I’m baaaaack.
And I got married (to the Swede).
Aaaaand I had a wedding.
Aaaaaaaaand Preeti took my photos (what?! Crazy, that’s right kids, the blog lady to end all Indian wedding blogs, took my wedding photos…ps…they are awesome).
Annnnnnnd I kind of hated the entire wedding process. It’s true. Though my wedding turned out beautiful, everyone had a great time, the food was delicious, we danced the night away, and my darling husband was quoted to saying it was the best day of his life (collective awww). I still have a mild case of PTSD from the whole process.
I definitely learned a few things that, with hindsight being 20/20, I would have thought about doing very differently. Though I am working on a more in-depth discussion of some of the topics, I’m going to give you all a list of the things I would have done differently during the planning process and the actual day itself.
*drumroll*
Abby’s Top 10: Wedding Hindsight is 20/20
This is how it feels to know all the planning is over. We survived! We did it! Now lets go make ourselves, friends, and family cry! Have some toasts! Eat some cake! And Dance our Booties off! YES! HUZZAH! (Photo by Preeti)
1. Different cultures have different wedding cultures. Make sure you and your partner are crystal clear about what is expected at the wedding, and what customs are being practiced. (P.S. a lot of this will also have to do with the location of the wedding, because that will probably be the main ‘cultural experience’).
My husband is not American. He did not understand American wedding customs or cultures, so even though he read books on the subject, I should have sat down with him more and carefully (and in writing) made a clear list of his responsibilities.
There needed to be careful conversations about differences in wedding cultures, or in my case, what happens at a wedding, period.
2. Take your significant other to a wedding if they have never been to one before. No joke. I should have taken the Swede to a wedding before ours. He had never been to a wedding before. Seriously. Seriously.
3.DIY is for the birds. Saving money or no, DIY is for the birds. Misery. Pain. Tears. Blood. The Ugh or The Ugh-ly. So over it. I had macarons coming out of my rear end, tea tins to my eyeballs, vintage table cloths, nasty white polyester tablecloths and chair covers exploding out of every corner of my house, and a lot of flowers delivered two days before the wedding…Bless my every talented bridesmaid who did all of my flowers… (At least I had enough sense to not DIY my invitations…*high five*)
4. I wish my mother had helped me more in the planning and execution process. The. End.
5. A wedding planner is worth the money and your sanity. You’ll need someone who will be your advocate and will help think for you when you get bridal brain. Friend (not bridesmaid) or Professional. They’re worth it. (I will stress this 100x if you’re having an international wedding with people from out of town/country staying in your home the week or so before the wedding.)
6. Make sure your caterer will bus tables if you get plates from another vendor. Because you’ll feel a bit like an ass if your bridesmaids become bussers at your wedding. No joke.
7. Clean up sucks at the end of the wedding. Especially if you’re dehydrated (OMG it sucks so terrible…please see #9). Make sure your bridal party knows their full responsibilities for the wedding i.e. setting up, partying down, cleaning up…in fact..make sure you know that and make sure someone who wont get bridal brain will know that the few days leading up to the wedding.
8. Do not forget to plan lunch/breakfast/etc. for the day of. This is a perfect job for a bridesmaid and/or a parent. You will forget, and you will suffer for it later. Eat before you get nervous, so you don’t upset your tummy.
9. Do not forget to drink water either. Dehydration + Exhaustion + Stress + Dancing + (opt) Booze = a really rough day after. Water. Drink it. Own it. Love it. Drink it some more.
10. Sometimes, it’s worth the extra money to get something that is more inclusive with a (slightly terrifying, but in hindsight useful) wedding planner who will ‘save you from yourself’, and also tell everyone else what to do when you’re too stressed and are in full ‘wedding brain’ mode. Yeah…you know I might have saved some money, but the Sunday after my wedding, my husband and a groomsman were hauling trash to a landfill 10 miles away from the venue because they apparently don’t have their own trash removal service or..you know…a dumpster.
Alright you lovely readers, that’s all for now. I have learned a lot about weddings over the past 2 years, and I am looking forward to sharing with you all about my ups and downs…also all the of the embarrassing and hilarious stories that are stored away for a rainy day. 🙂
<3 <3
